Am I raising Monsters?!
Believe it or not, that thought has gone through my mind more than once in recent days. Mostly in regards to Mimi and Buddy. It seems that not matter how often we talk about how important it is to be kind, to listen and obey, and to help each other, they are constantly at each others' throats/rolling around fighting/pulling hair/biting/hitting. You name it we have seen it in the past few weeks. Even though every day in their prayers they ask for help to be kind and obedient, their physical attacks on each other (or us) have been worse than ever before. And Buddy doesn't limit his attacks to just Mimi, Sweetsa also gets her share of obviously unprovoked violence.
When I asked Mimi why she has recently been hitting and scratching me, she replied, "It's because of my giant temper!" We then had a talk about how she is in control of her actions, her "temper" does not control her. We then talked about how she would begin to lose priviledges if she continued her outbursts. And I have to admit things have been a bit better since... at least between the two of us.
This morning after a series of atrocious behavior, I let Mimi and Buddy know that we would send all the expected friends home if there was one more incident between the two of them (I was trying to get ready for our neighborhood Mommies' Group to be at our house for lunch). Things went much better after that, but I was really wondering what to do with my violent and disobedient kids. What can I do differently to help them understand that these behaviors are NOT acceptable?!
And then after everyone else left and we got everything cleaned up, I put Sweetsa down for a nap. As I returned to the living room, Buddy went up to Mimi, gave her a HUGE hug and said, "I'm sorry I was mean to you. I love you. Do you want me to get Princesses for you?" referring to the Princess gallery on PlayhouseDisney. With his sweet little lisp and ernest face, he was unresistable. Mimi promptly forgave him and then apologized to Buddy. They proceeded to take turns so nicely, it truely melted my heart!
So I guess they aren't monsters, just kids. But I wish I could see more of the hugging and less of the hitting.
posted by B at 2:15 PM
5 Comments:
I love Megan's explaination! That is so funny coming from a little kid! Okay, maybe funny at least for me, but probably not for the parents.
doesn't that one little act make it all worth it! Hopefully the niceness continues!
Cute little Monsters, they are! Good luck!
I'm hoping you get it all figured out by the time my #2 comes along. If not, I at hope mine will at least learn to reconcile as sweetly as yours have. Keep it up! You're obviously doing a great job, even on the monster days!
I have been feeling exactly the same way about my two older ones. It has been really frustrating because the brawls and fights (often with screaming whining and crying) happen when I am occupied with the third. I guess I am not a bad parent with monster kids, just a normal parent with normal kids. Thanks for the reality check and hopeful ending.
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